Monday, December 17, 2012

Heartbroken Christmas

As I write this blog post it is with a heavy heart. A heart that is just broken over the tragedy in Newtown, Conn at Sandy Hook Elementary school. When I heard the news, I was the parent that went and picked up my kids early from school just so I can hold them. As I saw each one of them walk down the hall: Cale-8, Chloe-6, Case-3, I began to cry...and I haven't really stopped. Yes, there has been momentary times of laughter and fun, but then I would find myself just weeping. I cried when I saw them, I cried when I hugged them, I cried because I didn't want to let them go.  I read different people's posts about not talking about it much with your kids or controlling your emotions with your kids so they can see how strong Jesus is in you. I even had a mom ask me "Why are you crying? Did you know someone there?" She wasn't being rude, she was just curious. I did talk about it with my kids....I have shown my kids a lot of emotion...why was I so upset, I didn't know anyone involved?....Is my faith weak? Does showing so much emotion mean I don't trust in my Jesus?

So many questions about the "why's" of this tragedy and so many questions about the "how" we should handle it. I don't know the "whys" and I don't know the right "hows" but I do know the God who understands it all and I turn to His Word and His Words to provide comfort.

I turned to the story of Jesus, Mary, Martha, and Lazarus in John 11:1-43...
Lazarus had become very sick and the sisters had sent Jesus a message to return to that Jesus could heal him. Instead, Jesus did not come and stayed for 2 more days. By the time Jesus returned to Bethany, Lazarus had been dead for 4 days. Mary and Martha approached Jesus with the same statement..."If you had been here, my brother would not have died." They wanted to know why. They wanted to know why this had to happen. They wanted to know why did he allow this. They wanted to know why he didn't come to their rescue. Why? Why? Why? Sound familiar?
Scripture says in verse 33, "When Jesus saw her weeping and the Jews who had come along side with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit, and troubled....(vs 35) Jesus wept." We learn in the story that Jesus then walks to the tomb and raises Lazarus from the dead.

I find comfort in knowing our God wept with those who lost a loved one.He knew His power...he knew His strength...He wasn't sad because Lazarus died:Afterall,  He knew that He was about to bring him back to life. No...He cried because those he loved were heartbroken. He showed emotion and therefore showed his heart. I believe on December 15, Jesus cries once again. He cries, not because of the children...he is holding them. He cries because of His other children...the parents, the grandparents, the aunts and uncles, husbands, friends, co-workers, a nation that is utterly heartbroken over this tragedy. We cry therefore he cries. Our hearts are broken, therefore His heart is broken. He knows that there will be good come of this tragedy yet... he weeps with us. He knows that His goodness will win over evil yet... he weeps with us. I find comfort in knowing that I can weep because my Savior weeps. I can be emotional because those WERE my kids...those were your kids. I saw my baby girl's eyes in one the victim's pictures....I saw my sweet boy's smile in the one of the victim's pictures...I saw my baby boy's cheeks in one of the victim's pictures. I saw my children in every single one one of those pictures and I wept.

I find comfort in the words that Jesus said to Martha in her grief, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?"

I dropped my children off at school today and I did it with tears, because God asked me once again..."Do you trust me with your children? Do you believe that if they never come home today...I still have them? Do you believe that even if they are gone on this earth...you will see them again. Do you believe this?" YES Jesus I do!!!

For more about trusting God with our children...you can read my Christmas blog post right before this one...

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

A Lesson learned from Mary and Joseph

My husband was telling me about an incident that happened yesterday with our oldest son, Cale. My husband was at a gas station and was approached by a man that needed some money. All my husband had was Cale's money he was holding for him...and ended up giving it to the man in need. My husband is telling Cale the story about how the man needed money and Cale was super excited that His dad, once again, was the hero and gave the man some money...But then when his dad continued and told him that the money he gave the man was His, he was trying so hard to hold back the tears..."That was his money, he had worked so hard for that money, he had saved it and not spent it because there was something special he had in store for that money." Recognizing that this was extremely hard news to hear, but knowing Cale would never say any of this, but knew he was thinking it; He asked Cale if he trusted Him, as his father, that he would take care of him and his money. With a hesitate but confident "Yes", his dad took him to the toy store and all was right in the world again.
Just like Cale, there is something that we view as ours, our most prized possessions, our children....they are ours, we work hard for our children, we have prayed and provided for our children, and we have special plans in store for our children. But just as Cale's father asked him if he trusted him...there will come a time that God will ask us to trust Him with our children....Just ask Mary and Joseph.
We most always refer to Jesus as God's Son, and sometimes I forget He was also the son of Mary and Joseph as well. Mary is the one who gave birth to him. Joseph is the one who named him. Mary was the one who fed him. Joseph was the one taught him the carpentry skills. From the moment the angels appeared to both Mary and Joseph, they became parents. They were going to rejoice over this baby boy, they were going to play and wrestle with this little boy, they were going to love this little boy because he was their son, their child, their little boy. But there came a point at some time when they had to remember and remind themselves that although God entrusted this baby boy, turned infant boy, turned teenage boy, turned adult man that He in fact belonged to God....And so do we. God has entrusted us with His babies, His little girls, His teenagers and there will come times in each stage of life that we are going to have to trust God with the children he has entrusted us. Maybe your child is in the hospital right now and you feel so helpless...You can trust your father with your child. May be your child is struggling in school right now...You can trust your father with your child. May be your child is going through some rebellion and you just don't understand...You can trust your Father with your Child. After all, Your Father is their Father!
I have a passage marked in my Bible that has all three of my children's names beside it. It is on 2 Corinthians 1:24, "We want to work together with you so you will be full of joy, for it is by your own faith that you will stand firm." Our goal as parents is to work together with God so that our children can be full of joy and stand firm in their own faith because of God....just like Mary and Joseph.
I can't imagine how hard it was for Mary and Joseph to watch their Son go through the torture and torment he did willingly, but they trusted their Father with their son from the cradle to the cross...and in turn, their son became their Savior.

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Time out!

So...we had one of those moments...you know, those moments where your life could have been in the "Calgone take me away" commercials. The kids and I had met one of the college athletes I mentor at Braums for ice cream. Everyone had their icecream and we are all sitting in the booth chatting and having a good time. My youngest, Case (3), crawls up into my lap and just whines a little bit. He then begins to start coughing and  as I reach for the cup of water, he pukes all over him, me, table, booth, floor, and I am pretty sure I saw some on the ceiling. I had never seen so much throw up come out of a little body. The college girl, Brianna, gets me some paper towels and i could tell she could go at anytime, and then my Chloe starts gagging too. I had Brianna take Chloe out of the way while I am trying to calm a very sad and scared little boy and clean us up in some way. It was crazy...and about that time...something is hitting me in the face...its my 8 year old spitting spit wads at me through his straw. "Really??!!, do you really think this is a good time for that?" came out of my mouth and Oh how I wanted a timeout...a timeout from life at that moment.
Can you relate?
I find myself asking God this same question..."Really?!, do you really think this is a good time for that?" What I am really saying in that question is, "God I don't think there is a good time for bad times.
Oh, but His ways are not our ways...His wisdom is not our wisdom...His thinking is not our thinking.
One of my favorite women of the Bible is Esther. Esther was a Jewish woman who was chosen to be the Queen to King Xerxes right after the King had banished the first Queen from the Palace because she refused to come to him when He sent for her. Dang, that would be a hard role to fill...talk about walking on egg shells with the hubby. Well, there was an evil guy who was the King's most powerful official named Haman. Haman came up with an evil plan to kill all the Jews because he didn't like Mordecai, a Jew who refused to bow down to Haman and who also happened to be Esther's cousin. Are you still with me? This IS in the Bible and not an episode of Days of Our Lives...promise.
Mordecai asked his cousin, the new Queen to help him and their people..."Don't think for a moment that because you're in the palace you will escape when all other Jews are killed. If you keep quiet at a time like this, deliverance and relief for the Jews will arise from some other place, but you and your relatives will die. Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for such a time as this?" Esther 4:13-14
Um... we are put into certain positions or circumstances for such a time this...time to show my children how to act in a stressful situation, time to show the patience that I had been praying for, time to show the character of Christ, time to see the goodness of God even in the worst of times.
What we learn is that Esther didn't ask for a timeout from this time in her life...she used the position and the time she was given to bravely ask the King for help and he did! Esther and her people were saved.
May be you would like a time out from your marriage and God wants to use this time to bring you both closer to Him. May be you would like a time out from your job and God wants to use this time for you to trust HIM.
What if we looked at life through the same eyes as Mordecai and Esther and ask ourselves "What if God has placed is in this season of life for such a time as this?" There is always a good time for God to teach us life lessons and some times he uses bad times to do it.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, "For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven."
There are times to win and there are times to lose
There are times to be with loved ones and there are times to be alone
There are times to have icecream and there are times to throw up icecream
And Yes, there is a good time for bad times...just ask Esther
Afterall, "God has made everything beautiful for its own time." Ecclesiastes 3:11

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Truth or Trash

After a message from church one day, my family started playing a game that we play often...it's called Truth or Trash. We will ask the kid squestions like: "if you mess up, God loves you less..truth or trash?" or "you have been created by God, for God, to do great things because of God...truth or trash?" They love it and are learning the difference between the truth of who God says they are and the trash the World says they are. As a wife of a coach and person in ministry, I play this game all the time...it just happens to be random people saying the statements and I have to ask myself is this truth or trash. Paul could relate...

In the book of Acts 27 and 28 we read that Paul was on his way to Rome, as a prisoner, and the ship he was on wrecked and the sailors found themselves on the island of Malta. It was cold, rainy, and they decided to build a fire. This is where we pick up the story in Acts 28:3-6, "As Paul gathered an wood for the fire, a poisonous snake bit him on the hand. The people of the island saw the snake hanging from his hand and said to each other, 'A murderer, no doubt! Though he escaped the sea, justice will not permit him to live."'But Paul shook off the snake into the fire and was unharmed. The people waited for him to swell up and drop dead. But when they had waited a long time and saw that he wasn't harmed, they changed their minds and decided he was a god."

In the matter of about 5 minutes, based on the world's view of Paul he went from being a murderer to a god. The Truth was he was neither. The truth of who we are is not based on what people say we are, we are who God says we are...nothing more and nothing less. As a coach's family, we go through times where people will say that we walk on water (this is usually when we are winning) and then there are times when we will be told we are not a good role model. There will be times people will give you life with their words or try to give you death with their words. We have to learn that truth of who we are doesn't come from the mouths of people but from the mouth of God. Yes it is hard and yes I am tempted to believe the trash, but a wise man once told me "Just keep in mind that everyone has an opinion. Doesn't make them right. Live in truth not opinion."
There are 2 traps to listening to the world: 1) Those that say you are a god 2) Those that say you are a murderer. Paul addresses the first one in Romans 12:3, "...I give each of you this warning: Don't think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us."
It is kinda like when my son was playing football and we overheard him tell the coach, "coach, if you want to score, give me the ball." After the game, we talked about what humility is. The very next game we heard him say the same thing. We asked him, "Cale, we talked about this. What is humility?" He replied, "It is when you know that God made you this good." Dad gum it! That is it! He knew he was good, not because of what anybody said, but because he knew he was good because of God....he knew the Truth!

And for those who say that you are a murderer, Paul says in Romans 8:15, "So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God's Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now, we call him, "Abba, Father." For his Spirit joins with our spirit to affirm that we are God's children." You are a murderer...Trash. You are a slave to this world...Trash. You are not good enough....Trash. You don't measure up to other people....Trash. You are a daughter of the King of Kings....Truth. You are enough....Truth. You are a child of the living God...Truth!
The Truth is God and when we know the truth the truth will set us free. Set us free from pleasing people to pleasing God. Set us free from seeking peoples approval and seeking God's. Set us free from living for the world and living for God.
If there is anyone who understands this and can help us through these time is none other than Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith. He was paraded through town with people shouting "Hosanna! Hosanna!" and one week later put on a cross by the same people shouting "Crucify Him! Crucify Him!" And what did he do? He said, "Father, forgive them for they do not know what they do." Forgive them because what they say is trash, forgive them because they do not know the truth.
There are going to be times in our lives when we are getting told by the world that we are murderers or gods and we will have to look to God and ask "Is this Truth or Trash?" His opinion of us is the ONLY TRUTH!

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

What's your name

If you have been given a nickname in Sports you can bet its pretty stinkin cool. Everything from "The Rock", "Primetime", "Flo Jo"....you know you are awesome if you have been given an awesome nickname. Our family is no different....my kids love giving nicknames and love when we give them nicknames. It's like whatever name we give them they take on that persona. Here are some of the Roberts nicknames:  The Hulk, Speedy Gonzalez, Princess, Baby girl, Meal Ticket and we all fall under the nickname Team Roberts. It doesn't matter if we are referred to by our name, our nickname, or our family name we take pride in the identity we have been given. The crazy thing about our family is when someone comes over that they don't know very well, or we are out in public with people we don't know...its like they forget their identity and go crazy.  We had one of Chris' football players over for dinner this week and I thought "who are these children?" They are not doing any of the manners we taught them, they are not behaving in a way that we usually do at dinner time...its like they have totally forgotten who they are...where is my princess? Where is my Hulk?, where is my meal ticket?, Where is Team Roberts? Can you relate?
Jesus Can
Jesus had a great relationship with Peter. Peter was one of Jesus' closest friends, followers, and disciples. One day their relationship changed...The day that Peter got a new nickname.
In Matthew 16:13-20, Jesus asked Peter who he thinks Jesus is and without hesitation Peter says, "Messiah, Son of the Living God." And Jesus replies, "...Now I say to you that you are Peter (Which means 'rock') and upon the rock I will build my church and all the powers of hell will not conquer it. And I will give you the keys of the Kingdom of Heaven..."
Peter proclaims who Jesus is to Him and in turn Jesus proclaims who Peter is in Christ
The Rock! How would you like to be given that nickname by the Son of God? That is awesome! He gave him that name because He knew that Peter was going to live up to the nickname, live up to the identity that he has now found in Christ. What a great moment! Then it happens...
Peter finds himself among the world, among people who he doesn't know and is questioning him about this man named Jesus. And the "Rock" failed. "The Rock" failed 3 times when he denied even knowing Jesus. Where was the Rock who said he would never leave Jesus? Where was the Rock who said he would die for Jesus? Oh but Jesus remained faithful to Peters identity in Christ. Even though Peter was faithless at one point, God remained faithful. You see, God doesn't just forgive he restores. After Jesus rose from the dead and was walking and talking with Peter. He asked Peter 3 times "Do you love me Peter?" Peter may have forgotten who he was but Jesus never did. Peter asked for forgiveness and then fulfilled the identity in which Christ had given him.
We all have been given an identity in Christ. May be yours is Rock because it is your rock solid faith that is holding your family together. May be yours is Princess because you need to know that you are beautiful because you are the daughter of the King. May be yours is Leader because God is going to do great things through you for His Kingdom. Like Peter and my children, some have forgotten their identity and who they represent and need to return to it. Some  have no idea what it is because they have never met Christ. We need to learn from Peter that we have to know who we are in Christ before we can fulfill our purpose in Christ. Lose our identity-lose our purpose. Find our identity-find our purpose.
So....what's your name?

Monday, September 17, 2012

Never take a play off

Never take a play off...never take a day off...never take a practice off....these are some of the things coaches tell their players every day. They can never take it easy because the moment they do somebody else is going to hit them square in the mouth. Always be on guard, always be on your toes, always be awake. Key points to a great practice and a great game...
A man by the name Eutychus could have really used that piece of advice the night he fell asleep listening to Paul preach. In Acts 20:7-12 we meet Eutychus and I am sure Eutychus was a great man in search of an even greater God which is why he was listening to Paul preach until after Midnight...but he fell asleep, he took a play off, he let his guard down for just a moment and what happened? "..He fell sound asleep and dropped three stories to his death below." That's right he fell right out the window and died. 
So how do we fall? Just like Eutychus...we fall asleep.
-Life gets too busy and our time with Jesus goes out the window and we fall asleep
-We read the Word of God to finish not to change and we fall asleep
-We do things out of habit instead out of a pursuit for Holiness and we fall asleep
-We flirt with sin one step at a time and we fall sleep
-We put our love of this world over the our Love for Jesus and we fall asleep
If you are like me, you can relate to one or all of these scenarios. You are going along with life just listening to the preacher one minute and then you got lazy, let your guard down, and bam...you realize your relationship with Jesus is in survival mode and you realize you have fallen asleep.
Just like Eutychus...we too can wake up! That's right Paul rushed to him, healed him, and he woke up!
The message Jesus gives to the church of Sardis in Revelation 3:1-4 is the same message He wants to give to you today..."I know all the things you do, and that you have a reputation for being alive-but you are dead. Wake up! Strengthen what little remains, for even what is left is almost dead. I find that your actions do not meet the requirements of my God. Go back to what you heard and believed at first; hold to it firmly. Repent and turn to me again." 
First, we need to realize nobody can fall too far that Jesus can not reach them. Wake up and realize you and your faith have fallen asleep.
Second, Turn back to God and ask God to draw near to you again. We must return to our first love, Jesus. We need to date Jesus and remember why we fell in love with Him.
Third, the Bible says Eutychus went home unhurt. I love this! He returned home without a scar, without a wheelchair, without any signs that he had fallen asleep and fell out of a window. We must go back to God, but not look back on our failures. We don't have to walk around with the scarlet letter on our chest that shows we fell asleep...we don't look back, we go on ,unhurt, not because of anything we did, but because of what Jesus did! He heals us when we are dead. He saves us when we fall. He wakes us up when we fall asleep.
If you have taken a play off its time to WAKE UP and get back into the game!!!!

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Dont make me say it again...

My kids and I love to go and watch my husband's football practice. One of the things I have noticed is when my husband says something once you listen, but if he says it twice you better make sure and do it.  Much like when I am at home...when I something once it is important, but if I have to say it twice, the momma train is coming choo choo!
Therefore, if Jesus, the son of God, says something once it is important, but if He says it twice, you might want to put down all other things listen, take notes, and put what he says into action. Well, I was reading in Matthew at the different times Jesus was dealing with the Pharisees. In Matthew 9:13 Jesus is talking to the Pharisees after they asked the question, "why does your teacher eat with such scum?" Jesus replies with, "Now go and learn the meaning of this Scripture: 'I want you to show mercy not offer sacrifices.'
Then when the Pharisees questioned Jesus about picking grain on the Sabbath. He answered with, ..."But you would not have condemned my innocent disciples if you knew the meaning of this Scripture: 'I want you to show mercy, not offer sacrifices.'

Ok Jesus you have my attention: "show mercy not offer sacrifices." As I was trying to figure out what that scripture meant I was reminded of something Jesus said in the sermon on the mount in Matthew 5-7. "Not everyone who calls out to me, 'Lord! Lord! will enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Only those who actually do the will of my Father in heaven will enter. On judgement day many will say to me, 'Lord! we prophesied in your name and performed many miracles in your name.' But I will reply 'I never knew you..."

Oh the things we do in His name. We do so many things in His name aka offer sacrifices...
-In His name I told that group of people they were going to hell because they were gay
-In His name I have never touched a drop of alcohol and condemn those who do
-In His name I told someone exactly what I thought of them
-In His name I picketed in front of the abortion clinic yelling at the girls going in
-In His name I voted Republican all across the board
-In His name I told someone they needed to get their act together before going to church

We do a lot of things IN HIS NAME....but doesn't reflect HIS HEART. We can speak truth, but Jesus says he came to speak Grace and Truth (John 1:14). You can speak truth but if you do not show love...it is worth nothing. You can stand up for the things of Christ but if you do not show love...it is worth nothing. You can offer sacrifices but if you do not show mercy and love...it is worth nothing.

Alright Jesus you have my attention, but knowing me...you may have to say it again:)

Monday, August 20, 2012

Just Do It

Nike commercial? Nope just my son. Every morning my kids have their stations that complete before going to school. The usual stuff: get dressed, brush teeth, eat breakfast, make bed, and bible time. The one that gets my youngest son (Case, 3) is making his bed. Every morning he says, "Mom, can you help make my bed?" I will say yes and begin to help him. He, in turns, starts playing catch with himself, kicking the ball, anything except help make the bed. I say, "Case, you need to help me make your bed." And he replies, "Mom, can you Just Do It?"

You see, in my son's mind helping him means just doing it for him. We live in a world where we want God to just do it...come down to the world, live a perfect life, die a painful death on the cross, and raise 3 days later from the dead. That's all...just do it. We want to do nothing, give nothing, sacrifice nothing. Although he did do what we couldn't do for ourselves, he died a death we should of died, he did do all that needed to be done for us to be saved from an eternity without him...He still asks us to do one thing: Give Him US!

 Jesus said in Luke 9:23, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me.

I am reading a book right now that is so awesome and rocking my world. It's called Not a Fan.
I highly recommend it! It talks about how so many people are simply just fans of Jesus, but not really followers. They want just enough to Jesus to save them from hell, but not too much where they have to change their lifestyle or mess with their daily living. In other words, want Jesus just to do it and we say thanks...we will see you in heaven. No! Jesus said we take up our cross and follow him every day. We turn from our selfish ways and follow him every day.

James 2:26 says it this way, "Just as the body is dead without breath, so also faith is dead without good works." We can not have a faith in Jesus without doing something. We don't do great things to get to heaven, we do great things because we get to go to heaven.

Living in the house of a coach, I know there are so many kids out there who have so much God-given talent, but never reach their full potential because they want someone else Just to do it. They want someone else to run the sprints, lift the weights, learn the plays, do the sacrifice so that they can just play football. They don't understand....they have been given a gift now go use it, exercise it, sacrifice for it!!

We have been given a God-given gift through Jesus...now my challenge is to go use it, exercise it, and sacrifice it! When you accepted Christ as your savior the Bible says, "My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."

What will you do in the name of Christ today?




Monday, August 13, 2012

Put me in Coach...

I am going to need everyone to sing along....Put me in Coach, I am ready to play (clap clap) today (clap clap). Look at me..I can be center field. Oh how I love this song because it is about a kid who wants to play so bad, he would rather play the worst position on the field (when it comes to little league) just so He can be in the game.  Whatever it takes, whatever you need  I will do it because that's what you need, coach. I have been married to a coach long enough to know that every coach wants the heart of this little leaguer to be in every kid that he coaches. Why is Rudy one of the greatest sports movies of all time? Because Rudy had this kind of heart, the heart that said "I will get my face pounded every week to make the team better just so I can be on the team." We serve our head coach, God himself,  that is searching for these hearts to be on His Team. He searching for the hearts not the talented. He searching for the hearts not the gifted. He searching for the hearts not the experienced.

We learn from Isaiah how it works...
"And I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Who should I send and who will go for us?" Then I said, "Here I am! Send me."

Just like our little baseball player, I can see Isaiah jumping up and down saying "Put me in coach! I am ready to play, I will do whatever you need. Wherever there is a need I will serve. Wherever there is a need I will pray, wherever there is a need I will encourage. Look at me...I can even play center field.
The first thing we learn from Isaiah is we have to be in the presence of God to overhear the desires of God.  We must be in seeking God through His Word, through His Church, and through prayer.
The second thing we learn from Isaiah is there is no "But" after He says, Yes!
He doesn't say, "Yes I will but I wont say that. Yes I will but I wont go there. Yes I will but just not now. He just wants us to say Yes and then trust Him with the Rest.

God is still roaming the earth asking and searching "who will go into the schools and share my son?, who will go into their homes and share my son?, who will go into the hospitals and share my son? who will go into the restaurants and share my son?, who will go? Who has the heart I am looking for?

Will you say, "Put me in coach, I am tired of being on the sidelines, I am ready to play!"
If there is something God is laying on your heart...I wan to pray for you as my teammate:)

Friday, July 27, 2012

Yes I'm still here....barely:)

I am back from a summer of softball, speaking, and FCA camps! And it is great be home:) I need to start off this school year by sharing what God has been teaching me over the past 3 months. God has given me some amazing opportunities over the past few months to be a part of some great things for His Kingdom.  I had the privilege of going to Minnesota and speaking to 2 different womens groups, be the chaplain of the OU softball team who went to the college world series and played for a national championship, went to Kansas City to help write the FCA camp curriculum for next year, and serve at 4 FCA camps we do here in Oklahoma. To people on the outside these may sound like great, fun, exciting, neat experiences... although they were, I had to deal with little things called fear, worry, anxiety, doubt every step of the way.  I was living in a little world my friend calls "double minded." It describes it best in James 1:5-8
"If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. Such people should not expect to receive anything fro the Lord. Their loyalty is divided between God and the world, and they are unstable in everything they do" 

Wow! Talk about spit on your face, kick you in the crotch fantastic. This was me "unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind and "unstable in everything they do." I would freak out at the thought of what I was getting ready to have to do because I wasn't good enough yet worthy enough to be doing it. I would cry and some times puke...Then go out on stage or field and tell everyone how to strengthen THEIR faith and trust in God. I was wavering between my faith and my insecurities. Can you relate? May be you have been called to be a mom and you are flooded with insecurities about the job you are doing. May be you have started a new job and you are flooded with insecurities that you can't do this.
When we pray and still worry...when we pray and still fear..when we pray and still doubt...our loyalty has been divided between God and the world.
We become just like the Israelites (Exodus 16-32) We rely on God when things are going our way but the moment we are faced with the fear of the unknown we build ourselves a golden calf and ask God "Where are you?" This kind of faith will not do the impossibles, this kind of faith will not move mountains, the kind of faith does not give you life to the full, and this kind of faith does not let you enter into the promised land...and Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith (Hebrews 12:1), died and rose again so that we could have a faith like His....solid, unwavering, and immovable.
I learned from my awesome high school Sunday school teacher that faith can be described as Action Based on Belief sustained by Confidence. For my faith to be complete I am still learning the "sustained by Confidence" part.  "He alone is my Rock and my Salvation. He is my fortress. I will not be shaken." Psalm 62:6

Be encouraged that today could be the day that God wants to start growing your faith where He and He alone gets your undivided attention!


Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Faith like a child

Let me set this up for you...we live in tornado alley. Last night we had crazy storms with tornadoes, baseball size hail, and winds up to 80 mph. It was nuts....living in Oklahoma my entire life you get pretty used to the drill...sirens going off, power goes out, you take cover, and you wait. The only difference last night was my husband, my rock, my security, the one that keeps me calm wasn't there. He was 4 1/2 hours away at my parents house working harvest. I was extremely calm on the outside and completely freaking out on the inside. I was like a duck paddling like crazy underneath, but calm on top of the water. My three kids (7,5,3) and I were in our closet, with our helmets on, with our flashlights and waiting. Waiting for the storm to hit. Waiting to see what aftermath the storm would live behind. Waiting to see if I could keep it together for the family. Then the storm hit..the hail was so loud that my sweet baby boy Case began to cry and tremble while clinging to me for dear life. As I tried to console him, wishing Chris was here to console me, I hear the sweetest voice say the sweetest thing,"Case, Jesus says we are not suppose to have fear, but He will take care of us." Then I heard a voice that took charge of the closet, "Case, with God all things are possible."
And at that moment I understood what Jesus meant when he said "Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the Kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it." Mark 10:15
They got it! My two oldest stepped up...Heck, I was ready to accept Christ again right there in their closet, I was so moved by their faith. They believed what Jesus said over what was going on in the world. They believed Jesus and not in their situation. They believed Jesus in the midst of a great storm. I couldn't help but ask, "Where has my faith like a child been"....honestly, focused on the storm. When something broke, I focused on how we were going to pay for this instead of believing Jesus, "I will meet your needs." When things were stressful at work, I focused on how to fix it instead of looking to the "author and perfector of our faith." I have been so focused on telling God how big my storms were, when I should have been telling my storms how big my God is. BA BAM!!!!!
To grow spiritually, sometimes we don't need to know more, but just do what we already know...."like do not fear, God will take care of me or With God all things are possible" My children's faith strengthened my own! Oh I hope they never lose that "in your face, Satan" or "Whatever world, I love Jesus" or "Storms? Bring it"......kinda faith!
As we sat in that closet, and my children spoke Truth to calm Case (and momma), we turned on Jamie Grace and Toby Mac's song "Hold Me" as loud as we could and sang it as loud as we could. The crazy thing, when we focused on God, we couldn't hear the storm any more. What storm do you need to straight up speak Truth into?

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Triple Threat

We all know in the game of basketball, triple threat is the position you want to start before making any move such as dribbling, passing or shooting. It is the position that causes the most damage because you can make any basketball move from that position. Well, there is another triple threat that creeps its way into my life that will cause damage but not in a positive way. You know how people say they tend to take over God's job sometimes?...Well not me...I tend to take of the job of God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit...my triple threat. That's right...there are times in my life that I want to be the entire trinity...Can you relate?

First, God the father....I will pray for something or someone, but if my prayer isn't being answered in the timely manner in which I think it should or in the way I have prayed for....that's Ok I will be God and just take it back. Or there are those times when I believe in the promises that God has for me...but I will just help Him bring them to reality. There is one person that I look to when I decide that I can play God better than God can....Sarah. (Genesis 18-25) God had promised them children, but it just wasn't happening so Sarah decided to take it upon herself and have Abraham sleep with a servant girl and they would raise the baby. Yep that was her plan....she actually thought that was a good idea. The tragedy is: her plan, her playing God...nations are still at war (Muslim-Jews). Every time I feel like I want to help God out...I read Sarah's story and sit back and remember..."Be Still and Know that I Am God"....and you are not.

Then once I get that under control then I feel like I will just take over Jesus' role...the savior. It doesn't matter if it is my family, friends, or people I come across in the ministry...there are times I want to take over and save them from their troubles. I want to save them from themselves. I want to save them from any hurt or pain.  I want to save them from sin. I want to save them from hell. I want to SAVE THEM. Once again, I am reminded....that is not my job! The greatest pieces of advice I have ever received is "You are suppose to be faithful to the call, but you are not responsible for their answer." Your husband my be going through a difficult time right now....as much as you want to save him from it, God may be using this very thing to bring your husband closer to Him. Your children may be struggling in school....as much as you want to save them...God may be using it to clear the path to the plans HE has for them. The only Savior we need is Jesus Christ and Christ alone.

And it wouldn't be a triple threat if I didn't try to act as the Holy Spirit...convicting people for their wrong choices. Right? Don't we all do this? If people aren't living up to our standards (ours are so much higher than others...sarcasm) we feel like it is our job to convict them...that is why we have the billboards that say "Abortion is Murder" and "Gays are going to Hell." or may be it's a little closer to home...."I can't believe you let your kids watch that" or "dress like that." What we think is "ironing sharpening iron" is really looking at the plank in someone else's eye while we have a 2x4 hanging out of ours. The Holy Spirit raised Christ from the dead...I think it does it's job quite well....perfectly in fact.

As I am still growing every day in my walk with Christ...Jesus constantly reminds me that I am "fearfully and wonderfully made" as Sarah Louise Roberts...nothing else and nothing more. If God sent his son Jesus, to save me from death then the Holy Spirit wants to do something in my life....now that is an unstoppable team!

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

My Easter Lesson

I am notorious for missing my exits...I will be driving along most days and then the words, "Oh crap, I missed my exit" comes out of my mouth which means I end up taking the long way around. Why does this always happen? Because I am doing anything and everything except concentrating on my driving. I am usually trying to impersonate Mariah Carey with my mad singing skills, listening to a pod cast sermon, playing Truth or Dare with my kids (which usually ends with me eating a month old french fry that the kids have found in their seat), or yes...talking on the phone. OK, OK...I realize you all may be thinking stay off the road in Oklahoma when she is driving, but I really am a good driver...except when it comes to finding my exit. Even though it is right in front of me...I miss it. Even though I know it is coming up because I have driven it a thousand times...I miss it.
Can someone really be that incompetent that they miss the obvious? Just Ask....Judas Iscariot.
Here is a guy who is a pretty big part of the Easter story, yet we don't talk about him much because he was also one of the most tragic characters of the story. Here is a man that missed it. He missed his exit. He missed the obvious. He missed what was right in front of him....the relationship he could have had with Jesus, His teacher. Judas walked with Jesus, he talked with Jesus, was witness first hand to many of his miracles but he missed it because he was so focused on what He thought the Messiah should be. He was focused on his needs, wants, and desires. He was with Jesus, but missed Jesus. He missed out on the love that Jesus had for him, the plans Jesus had for him, the friendship Jesus wanted with him.
The saddest part of the story is....
"Then when Judas, his betrayer, saw that Jesus was condemned, he changed this mind and brought back the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and the elders, saying "I have sinned by betraying innocent blood."...and throwing down the pieces of silver into the temple, he departed, and he went and hanged himself." Matthew 27:3-5
You see, he missed the biggest part of Jesus....His forgiveness. There were two people that day who betrayed Jesus...Peter and Judas Iscariot. Both were disciples. Both were with Jesus. Both betrayed Jesus. One came back and asked for forgiveness...the other didn't. One is known as Peter the Apostle...the other Judas the betrayer. He missed his exit...the gift of forgiveness and unconditional love that this man right in front of him had to offer.
My encouragement and challenge this Easter...don't miss it. Don't miss what Jesus has to offer you. Maybe its forgiveness, freedom from the shame you have carried around. Maybe its rest that you so desperately need right now. Maybe it's direction of where to go next. Maybe its love, someone to look at you and say "I love you."
This Easter season as you go to church, surrounded by crosses and lilies, surrounded by Jesus everywhere making dinner to celebrate Jesus, getting dressed up for Jesus... don't miss Jesus. I know I'm not gonna!

Friday, March 9, 2012

Hall of Fame of Faith

I had lunch with a sweet friend this week who is track/cross country coach as well. She barely got into my car when she burst out the awesome news....she was just inducted into the Oklahoma Coaches Hall of Fame!!! Believe me there is no one who deserves it more than Coach Clay! She will be only the 2nd female ever to be inducted...Oh I was so proud of her.
There are a lot of hall of fames out there: the Cowboy Hall of Fame, the Nascar Hall of Fame, the College Football hall of Fame and on and on....
Wouldn't that be so awesome to be in one of them? Your name written somewhere that says you were the best of the best at what you were called to do.
I am reading through the book of Hebrews right now and I came across the Hall of Fame of Faith (Hebrews 11).... That's right the Hall of Fame faith. These were the people that God picked out to honor in His hall of fame. Some of the names include...Noah, Moses, Rahab, Gideon, and Samson. These are some big names of the Bible....but believe it or not they were men and women just like you and me. They were ordinary people that served an amazing God. They were ordinary people that had faith in an awesome God. Here is the thing....just because they had great faith didn't mean they were without faults. Yes, Moses had great faith the choose "to be mistreated with the people of God rather than to enjoy the pleasures of sin."(Hebrews 11:24) But it wasn't without fault...he murdered an Egyptian Soldier. Yes, Rahab had great faith to go against her people and hide the spies of God...but she wasn't without fault...Her occupation was a prostitute.
What we learn from our ancestors is that having great faith doesn't mean we are perfect it means we put our full trust in the one who is....God.
My favorite person in the Hall of Fame of Faith is none other than the MVP....Jesus.
"Therefore since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking the Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:1-2
Jesus is the "founder and perfecter of our faith." You see he is not asking us to have great faith in something that He himself was not willing to. It took the greatest faith for Jesus to trust God his Father when he said, "Father, if there is any other way please take this cup from me, But not as I will but as you will." He went through the ultimate rejection from man so that you and I would never have to go through rejection from God.....that is our MVP of faith.
You and I can have a great faith in God because of the faith of our God. What do you need to trust God with today?

Sunday, February 26, 2012

No other Name

I have always loved Christian music! This isn't easy to say but even as a kid when everyone was so amazed with the New Kids on the Block I was listening to Ray Boltz and Amy Grant. When I was in High School my friends and I didn't go to the Mariah Carey concert but we went to Point of Grace and Bebe and Cece Winans concerts. The same goes for now, my radio is always turned to Klove (or the Sports Animal during football season:)). Well, there is a song that is always on and we even see in church that moves me every time and there is one specific line in the song that has a way of bringing me to tears...


"My heart will sing no other name, but Jesus"


I think it gets me every time because that is where I long to be, but not yet there. You see, my heart sings a lot of name besides Jesus. And the one it sings more than any other is Sarah. It sings Sarah when I am selfish. It sings Sarah when I am self-serving. It sings Sarah when I am prideful. It sings Sarah when I have self-pity. It sings Sarah when I doubt. It sings Sarah when I worry. Can you relate?


I have had some pretty intense Dates with Jesus this week seeking his help, wisdom, comfort etc. and what I found was I was seeking answers not seeking Jesus. I was seeking answers when the answer was Jesus. When we seek Jesus we find comfort. When we seek Jesus we find the help. When we seek Jesus we find wisdom. Psalm 105:4 says, "Search for the Lord and for his strength; continually seek him."
One of the people that knew this better than any other is John the Baptist. He could have lived for himself yet he wore clothes "woven from coarse camel hair." He could have lived for himself yet he ate locusts. He had disciples of his own that even came to him and said "everybody is going to him instead of coming to us" and he replied, "I am not Messiah. I am only here to prepare the way for him.....therefore, I am filled with joy at HIS success. He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less."
He had a heart that sang no other name but Jesus...not even his own.
My heart will sing no other name, but Jesus

Friday, February 10, 2012

I Hate to Lose!

Can I just say...I hate to lose! It doesn't matter if I am playing candyland with my 2 year old, wii tennis with my 7 year old, or racing my husband on the scooters...I hate to lose. Then you throw in that I am a wife of a football coach and a chaplain for a softball team....there are times I am not sure if my heart can take it...all because I hate to lose. Can you relate? May be yours isn't sports maybe you can't stand not having the best cupcakes at the school, or you have to be the best dressed at every event, or your house has to be the cleanest in the neighborhood or you feel you just have to be the best in everything all day everyday. We all have our areas where we hate to lose and it gets exhausting and hopefully this blog post will encourage your heart and give you the opportunity to breathe.
I was reading twitter posts of people I follow and I read this quote that was made by CS Lewis, "Don't let your happiness depend on something you may lose." Wow! How powerful is that? AND how true is that? We base so much of our happiness on things that we may lose and probably will at some point. Jesus says it this way, "If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it." The ONLY true happiness is when we lay down our own desires, plans, dreams, and pick up the relationship with Jesus that will never go away. When we focus our time and efforts on being more Christlike, when we do lose those things we still have love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Because lets face it, we will lose. We will lose games, but we still have the love and joy of Christ. We will lose the cupcake war, but we still have the love and joy of Christ. We will lose our youthful looks, but we still have the love and joy of Christ. We will lose, but we will win with Christ.
Believe me when I say, this is the easiest message for me to type, but the hardest thing to live out. I am not saying I am going to like to lose, but I am truly praying and asking God to help me lose my lifestyle so that I can gain his. I want my joy to come from the giver of life, not the scoreboard at the end of the day:)

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

The Best of Me

I realize I confess a lot on my blog and today is no different...I guess I hope that in someway God will use my stories to get through yours. I read one little verse that hit me like a ton of bricks.
"Honor the Lord with your wealth and with the best part of everything you produce." Proverbs 3:9.
The part that hit me and made my mind race was..."honor the Lord with the best part of everything. The questions I started asking myself were "who or what gets the best part of me?"..."who gets the best part of my time?" "who gets the best part of my patience?" "who gets the best part of my attention?" I humbly had to admit that it wasn't the Lord. I often give him the leftovers. There are even times in my quiet times with Him that I have also planned the next days activities or this weeks family meal plan. So where does my best go? The ironic thing is my best goes to the ministry I have been given and the family I have been entrusted. For you it might be your work outside the home, or your kids, or your friends, or your tv, or your workout schedule. None of these are bad things, but when given our best time, attention, effort will always keep us from being our best for which God has called us to.
God knows that without giving Him our best then it is impossible to be the best at all he has called us to be...wife, mom, sister, friend, minister etc. It is all a reminder, once again, that I am called to "Be still" and sit at the feet of Jesus so that I can serve as the body of Christ.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

My Word for 2012

I have a confession...I am a fixer. Can you relate? I am the person that likes to "fix" the problems. When my kids come to me with a problem...I figure a way to fix it with a kiss or bandaid. If my husband has a problem...I figure a way to fix it with a letter or scripture. Being in ministry, People come to me daily with their problems and I immediately go into "OK, lets come up with a plan and see if we can fix this thing." It is my way of controlling the world in which I live in because if I can control it then I can fix it and everything will be ok. I don't like seeing people hurt and/or in pain so the easiest thing to do is try to fix it. Well, over the past couple of months my heart has been so overwhelmed and broken with all the problems I can't fix....like the pain my friend is going through in her marriage and nobody even knows it or the friend who is struggling with the most likely death of her TWO children or the girl that has struggled with years of abuse and the only way "she feels" loved is in the arms of another girl and on and on....
Well, I was laying in bed crying out to God about how I could help or "fix" them...I finally looked up and there on my wall were the letters I had put a few months back that read..."Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10
First, he calls us to "Be Still"...not do more...not serve more....not fix more but be still. Why? Ask Mary and Martha (Luke 10). I have always felt bad for Martha because all she wanted to do was serve. There is nothing wrong with serving in fact, we are called to serve. Jesus himself said, "For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and and to give his life as a ransom for many." What Martha was doing wasn't wrong she was just doing it in the wrong order. We are suppose to sit then serve. Sit at his feet so then we can serve. Sit at his feet so we know how to serve. Sit at his feet so we know when to serve. My prayer times were so filled with praying for the needs of other people that I forgot to just sit and marvel and who He was. I forgot to sit and be filled up. I forgot to sit and just "be still."

The second part of that verse reminded me that He is God and I am not. I was never intended to save anyone from their problems or even fix their problems. That is a weight I was never intended to bear. I was trying to be what only Jesus can....their Savior. We are not called to fix problems just LISTEN and point them into the direction of the ONE who can....Jesus. He is God, comforter, leader, provider, healer...ALL that we need.
So....My word for 2012 is Still. When there is a need...be STILL. When there is a problem...be STILL. When I am angry....be STILL. When I am overwhelmed....be STILL. This is not going to be easy for me, but in the words of Bethany Hamilton,"I don't need easy, I just need possible."
I would love to hear your WORD for 2012!!


.